


It's always darkest before the dawn

by Dr_Queen108



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-23
Updated: 2016-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-08 14:34:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5501003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dr_Queen108/pseuds/Dr_Queen108
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>MISSING YEAR. Just when Regina, the Charmings and the others got back to the Enchanted Forest after saying goodbye to Emma and Henry, the Queen is overwhelmed by the emptiness and the pain ravaging her heart since her son's departure. She can't seem to overcome this separation and doesn't let anyone help her until a certain thief happens to be the one person able to break her walls. Lot of angst.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Breakdown

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, so this is my very first attempt at writing a fanfiction and English isn't my mother tongue, so please try to get passed my mistakes. I honestly don't know where this is going and I don't know how long I want the story to last, so I'll see how it goes... So yeah, this is going to be mainly angst. I'll consider changing the rating if the story goes on, but you can always expect angst and feelings descriptions with me, so if you don't like it, well you know what to do ;) Here we go.

Regina woke up in a room she had forgotten she knew so well. Her own. Right. The Enchanted Forest. Her castle. Here they were. It had been a while now, almost a few weeks at least, but she still had to remember it to herself every single day. It was as if her mind was shielding itself, refusing to believe that she was back to this land and that she had no choice but to move on. They had just taken the castle from the Wicked Witch, her newly discovered sister, right after they arrived in this realm, leaving Storybrooke behind, leaving Henry behind. Forever. She exhaled deeply at this thought, blowing it away from her mind as she sat in her bed and brought her knees up to her chest. She looked around her, her eyes shifting from one artefact to another, each bringing up memories of her time as Leopold’s wife. These walls were containing so much memories, too many memories of a life she would rather forget. She shut her eyes closed as she felt a bunch of painful flashes surfacing in her mind. How could she forget? How could she get away from the miserable mess her life had become? When it wasn’t her present, it was her past that was crawling back up to her, torturing her. 

Regina got out of her bed and walked outside to her balcony. Hopeless, she looked at the horizon, thinking about the future. About her impending lack of a future… What was she going to do without her little prince, without her Henry? The horizon used to represent a promise of a better life, of freedom when she was younger. Now, it all seemed to have faded away. Because – she had to face it – no matter where she went, she could never escape this kind of pain nor get through this unsurmountable grief. 

She watched the first rays of sun warm up the land and she knew the sun was rising on Henry’s world too. And that was then that she realized how distance had built itself up between them. That wherever he was, this horizon wasn’t the same for him. Tears rolled down her eyes, furrowing her cheeks, digging into them and burning them. She bit her lips and closed her eyes to contain herself. Her hands were gripping the ramp so hard her knuckles were turning white. It was that same ramp she had fell from, decades ago. And now, in this moment, it was oh so tempting to succumb and do what Tinkerbell thought she had done years ago. Jump.  
For a few minutes, she kept standing there, considering the idea. She thought she had found a distraction sufficient enough in the destruction of her sister and had abandoned her first plan with the sleeping curse then, but she had to face it: nothing but Henry could ease her pain. And now here she was. Eyes shut down, mouth sealed, tears streaming down her face. She released her grip of the ramp and made a few step backs. And then, without warning, her heart exploded. 

 

Suddenly, she couldn’t contain the flow overwhelming her. She screamed out the breath she didn’t know she was holding and let out all the air that could fill her lungs in a sharp scream. She got down on her knees, too stricken by the pain stabbing her stomach. She held her head with both hands and kept screaming, yelling to death. As if this could help her get rid of the burden she was carrying… At this point, this very low point she had reached, crying and breaking her voice didn’t even help release a bit of her deep sadness. It weren’t her accepting her feelings and putting them on display. It was just plain distress disarming her completely. 

She got up and ran inside her room, throwing and breaking every single object that had the misery to be on her path. In a magical impulse powered by the Queen’s affliction, the many mirrors filling her bedroom shattered all at once, flying into glass fragments. As they exploded, the pieces cut her skin, drawing some of her blood and tearing her navy blue gown here and there. The pieces of glass fell to the floor in slow motion, unaffected by gravity’s rules. 

Then, she became silent. The physical pain succeeded to take her breath away for a few seconds, and she felt exhausted, drained. She slowly lost her composure, falling to the floor once again, as the shattered pieces of mirror kept falling down around her, like snow flakes. She lied down among them, bringing her knees up against her stomach. She was shaking, sobbing and heavily breathing. She was overwhelmed with pain and sorrow and, at the same time, she couldn’t feel anything else besides that, not even the sting of her bruises. She lost the notion of time and space and didn’t even notice when Snow came in her room, alerted by the noise. Snow left a scream escape her throat at this vision, while Regina didn’t react. She didn’t even move at all. She was catatonic. 

“Regina…” the princess breathed out. 

The Queen opened her eyes, her stepdaughter’s voice bringing her back to reality. Pain had restarted to suffocate her, taking her in its arms and pulling her down, lower, deeper than she’d ever been before. Snow kneeled down close to her, taking her in her arms. As she touched the woman she used to know but didn’t recognize now because entwined with too much sorrow, Regina yelled. It got Snow to move back and to break their contact. Silent tears were now filling her green eyes too. Regina’s agony was crucifying her. Regina kept screaming and screaming, holding onto her head and digging her nails into her skull, even to the point of tearing her olive skin. The sound of her breaking voice got Charming and a few dwarves to gather at the entrance of her room. 

“Snow! What happened?” Charming said as he hugged his wife. 

“It’s too much, David… She can’t handle it.”, Snow deplored. 

Prince Charming distanced himself from Snow White, walking towards the Queen who was still curled up on the floor, showing them her back. He was going to put his hand on Regina’s shoulder when Snow stopped him. 

“Don’t”, she said. “She doesn’t want to be touched.” 

After a while, Regina had managed to stop screaming, but the tears just couldn’t help themselves. At that point, she could have gone dehydrated only by the amount of tears she had shed. People had helped clean up the major part of the mess and then left her room, at last. When Snow came back a few minutes later, she noticed Regina had not moved from the floor, but she still wasn’t sure it was the right time to move her to her bed or at least to some place else, more comfortable than the cold stone. She decided to leave in order to give her some time and see if the Queen would initiate the movement herself. 

Snow didn’t see the intruder who had managed to sneak in and make its way to the Queen’s bedchamber. When she left, she closed the door, letting the Queen alone in the vacancy of her bedroom and of her heart. Not that it mattered, really. Surrounded or not, Regina felt more alone than ever. The intruder had waited for this moment to step into the light. He located his target among the remaining pieces of shattered glass and walked towards her. Regina didn’t even hear him coming for her. And then, without breaking the heavy silence reigning in the room, he kneeled down next to the vulnerable woman, knowing his next move was crucial.


	2. Falling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is longer than the precedent. Again, I do not own anything but my mistakes. The characters belong to Once ABC and I also included lyrics from Adele's latest CD, 25, in my dialogues, so these words belong to Adele Adkins, of course.

The intruder had been watching the Queen’s reaction when Snow and Charming touched her and he knew he needed to be cautious in order not to provoke her. Her eyes were still closed. _Maybe she’s sleeping_ , he thought. After all, it must be exhausting to cry and to burst into crisis all day long – because it was what she had been doing, according to what he saw. He laid down on his side, facing the woman he wished to comfort. His big brown eyes weren’t leaving the Queen’s eyelids, waiting for them to open. When Regina started to sob again and to get agitated, he straightened himself, apprehending her reaction to his presence. Since she didn’t seem to calm down, he put his tiny hand on her cheek. At the featherlike touch, Regina gasped back to reality, her puffy eyes setting on the small person in front of her. 

“Majesty! You’re awake!” he said. “You shouldn’t stay on the floor you know, it’s full of glass! Daddy says glass in dangerous, Majesty.” 

The young boy couldn’t slow down and Regina’s head was now turning and turning, trying to keep track of his words. She was lost in her thoughts and tried to focus on the babbling toddler standing before her. Roland. How did he get in here? 

“Look, it’s dangerous. It cuts. It hurts,” he kept going on. “See?” 

He was now offering her his small forearms, both a little bruised by glass fragments, and pointing her whole body, which hadn’t been spared either. Regina sat, taking Roland’s hands in her owns, steadying them. His forearms were facing up as she passed her hands over them to heal them. A purplish light emerged from her hands and then magic had done its work: no marks were left. 

“Woah! How did you do that, Majesty? Is it like when you saved me from the flying monster?” he asked, amazed. 

“Yes. It’s magic, Roland…” she traced off. 

She really was trying to put on a good face for Roland but the best she could attempt at it wasn’t much. He seemed to notice it. 

“You know, Majesty, Daddy always hugs me when I’m sad. And I always feel better after. Maybe I could hug you to make you feel better?” 

Regina was going to stop the little boy, not wanting to scare him in case her emotions took over, but before she could say anything, his arms were around her waist. At first she froze, holding her breath and unable to make any move. But then, she found his tiny embrace quite comforting and brought one hand to his sweet curls, the other on his back. She was truly touched by his gesture and couldn’t help a few tears to roll down. They were still cuddling on the floor when a sound emerged from outside the room. 

“Roland? Roland, where are you?” a raspy voice came from the hall. 

The man whose voice it was opened the door of the Queen’s bedchamber and slid only his head inside to see. 

“He’s in there, Robin,” Little John said, taking his head out of the treshold. 

“Ah, thank Gods, John,” the thief answered. “But… isn’t this room…” 

“Yes. The Queen’s bedchambers,” John finished. 

“I’ll handle this. You wait here.” 

“Gladly,” the imposing Merry Man agreed.

Robin entered the vast room, looking for his son. He located him in no time… In the Queen’s arms? How weird was that. He truly was right about her soft spot for children, especially for _his child_ it seemed. He noticed the poor state of the room, glass fragments covering the floor everywhere. He did hear Snow talking about someone’s “desperate state”. He put the pieces together and imagined this desperate soul would have to be no one but the Queen’s. But then again, here she was, hugging his son. The boy in question smiled as he saw his father was now joining them. 

“Daddy, daddy! Look, Majesty, my Papa is here, maybe he can help you feel better!” the young boy said eagerly. 

“Roland, my boy, I have told you not to come play in this part of the castle, you know that,” Robin Hood said calmly as he kneeled down to be at his son’s height. 

“Yes but Daddy I heard very loud noises and I wanted to see what it was… And I found Majesty in her room and she was sad so I couldn’t leave her, Daddy, could I?” 

“I am fine, Roland. Thank you,” the Queen quickly added as she greeted the child with the warmest smile she could afford to make. After all, that thief had seen her weak way too many times now. She couldn’t afford to put down her walls one more time, not in front of this forest smelling man. As soon as she had made the silent vow to herself to appear stolid and strong in front of Robin Hood, her body denied her resolution. She started shaking and let go of Roland, her members falling to her sides. Roland looked up to his precious Queen, but she looked away, diverting her face from both the father and the son as the first one kept going on. 

“I am truly sorry if he bothered you, your Majesty, it won’t happen again…” he didn’t finish his sentence as he saw the Queen’s façade starting to wear off. “You know what, Roland, why don’t you go see Little John, huh? He’s been missing you an awful lot.” 

“But, Daddy…” 

“Roland,” his father interrupted. 

“Okay. Goodbye, Majesty,” he said kissing her cheek, which was wet. 

The thief took his child by the hand walking him towards the door where Little John was waiting. As father and son were walking away from the Queen, she closed her eyes and felt the pain surfacing once more. She brought her right hand to where the boy left a kiss and exhaled deeply. Oh, how she wished he were Henry. Regina pressed each of her arms on her heart and her abdomen as she felt her emotions injuring her, piercing her through and through. This, this vain grasp, was her poor attempt to keep herself together. It was failing. Outrageously and cruelly failing. 

“Can you please take him, John?” Robin urged his friend. 

“You’re not coming, Daddy?” the boy wondered. 

“Not yet, Roland. I have to make sure the Queen’s alright. I’ll come tuck you in later.” 

With a simple nod, John agreed to take care of the toddler, taking him away from the Queen’s chambers as Robin returned next to Regina. He saw her, wrapping her arms around her small waist, as if she was hoping to prevent her body from literally falling apart, just like her mind seemed to have done. He believed he had seen her at her worst before, but in this moment, he had to admit he hadn’t seen anything quite like it until now… This woman, so powerful and so regal, was now nothing but a pale reflection of the Queen she used to be. The outlaw was pained to witness such a collapse from the woman he grew to appreciate in a special way since he met her, that much he couldn’t deny.

Robin put one knee on the floor and put both of his hands on the Queen’s shoulders. He was gathering his thoughts, trying to find the right words to soothe her sadness before speaking up. He was not used to being left speechless, being generally the one with quick and witty words, but he must admit that this disarming vision was troubling him more than he would have bet. He was still trying to find something more comforting to say than hushing when the Queen spoke, sparing him the task to break the silence. 

“I… I-I can’t… I can’t breathe. Make it… Make it stop,” she pleaded while heavy sobs were unsettling her. 

She was begging him. The Queen – the _Evil_ Queen according to most – was begging for relief. That’s when he understood just how deep her misery was. That was it. He couldn’t just let her on the floor among these glass fragments. “ _First things first_ ”, he thought. He stood up and lifted her from the floor. She began crying loudly as she hid her face in the crook of his neck. He brought her to her bed, gently letting her down on the mattress. At first, she was reticent to leave his strong arms but he gave her a comforting glare and half a smile which appeased her. He turned to face her big closet. 

“Regina, will you please change yourself?” he asked in a soft voice. “We can take off this dress and clean yourself up and then we can put you to bed.” 

He said “we”. He included her in his plan in hope to make her understand that they were a team, that he would never force her to do anything. She stood up with difficulty, still tottering and shaking. She passed next to him and entered the closet, her arms still crossed over her chest. She looked at him and nodded, making him understand that she would do as he proposed. However, she did not start moving right ahead, waiting for him to go. He was a little worried at the idea of letting her alone, but he respected that she needed privacy. 

“I will go tuck Roland in and I will be right back. Is that alright?” 

She nodded once more and watched him leave her chambers, closing the door behind him but not without giving her one last glance. She got out of her ruined dress and noted the many scratches all over her skin. She could have healed them with a simple wave of her hand, but she didn’t even bother. She put on a simple night gown and looked at the reflection of herself that her mirror offered. What had she become? Who was this woman staring back at her? She was absolutely disgusted. Disgusted with herself. She had lost, for good this time; there was no way to escape that pain. She had even stooped down to the point of searching comfort in the arms of that bastard, that thief. She was truly ashamed of herself. And at the same time, she felt completely helpless. She was not crying anymore, just heavily breathing. At this level, she considered only one option to be feasible. She gave up. She could no longer face this burden of a life. Not anymore.

“ _Let go. Just let go. You’ve got nothing left to lose. Absolutely nothing left…_ ” she whispered to herself. As the words filled the air, she plunged her right hand in her chest and ripped her heart out. She looked at it, resigned. She had made up her mind; there was no turning back now. Her heart, small, dark and crannied beating organ, was in her palm, ready to be crushed. For a moment, she got lost in her contemplation of it. How did she get here? She once was a loving young girl, a generous soul… When did she become like this? Probably when she lost Daniel, at the hand of her own mother. “ _Daniel_ ,” she thought. “ _Finally, I will be reunited with you, my love._ ” And Henry… May he forgive her for her cowardice. She was not as brave as her prince. “ _I am sorry, Henry, truly. Please forgive me. I love you. More than anything_ ,” she spoke aloud. 

She was so absorbed, she didn’t even hear the door lock at Robin’s return. 

“Regina?” he asked, panicked not to see her in her room. 

He moved forward, heading for her wardrobe and what he saw next consumed him. Regina was standing before him, offering him a view of her back in her beige nightgown. He couldn’t clearly see what she was doing, since she was returned and her body was shielding her reflection, but Robin could perceive an intermittent reddish glow blazing from either sides of her curves. Giving her mother’s reputation and her own, he could only assume the worst. 

“REGINA, DON’T!” 

She turned around to face him. 

“Don’t make one more move, Locksley, or this might be your last,” she warned. 

“Regina… You can’t do this,” he bemoaned. 

“Watch me,” she defied, an eyebrow up and a tear rolling down her cheek. “Take your eyes off of me, thief. You’re too late. I can’t bear this… I can’t live without him. You don’t understand.” 

“Of course I do, Regina. I told you I lost my wife and…” 

“AND I TOLD YOU, YOU HAVE NO IDEA, _ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA_ ,” she interrupted, anger and desperation twisting her beautiful features. “I told you,” she repeated in a slower tone, “You have your son. Henry, he… He was all I had. He was my everything. And I lost him. Forever. So don’t you dare tell me that you know what I’m going through because you don’t.” 

He tried approaching her a bit more but she denied him closure. He was devastated. 

“Now”, she pursued, “take your eyes off of me. I am already ashamed. Far too much to do this with you watching me. So will you, _please_ , have the decency to let me put an end to my suffering.” 

“Regina, there are other ways.”

“Have you not been listening or do you really enjoy watching a woman’s pain tearing her apart?” 

“No, Regina. _Never_. Especially not _you_ ,” he answered sincerely, his blue eyes staring so deeply in her brown orbs she could feel them piercing through her soul. 

She almost believed him. 

“There are no other ways. I’ve lost. Everything.” 

And since he wouldn’t look elsewhere, she turned her body slightly, avoiding his gaze by closing her eyes as she tightened her grip on her heart. The physical pain brought her to her knees and wrenched a cry from her throat. Robin seized this opportunity to take the heart from her hand. He tried to contain her fighting, holding her not brutally but firmly. 

“NO! NO! Stop it, don’t – AAH! – Do not touch me, thief,” she fought. “LET GO! LET GO OF ME! Don’t touch me! Don’t! HOW DARE YOU?! AH!” 

Her strength wasn’t of much help compared to his. She squeezed her teeth and magically pushed him away from her. The impulse got him flying out of the wardrobe and landing in the room on his back among cutting edges, but his clothes prevent him from getting injured, and he made sure Regina’s heart wasn’t touched either. As the Queen got out of her closet, he slowly stood up, holding her heart in his palms in a protective way. The Queen swept her glance across the whole room and then lifted her hand, causing all the widespread glass fragments to be suspended in the air, pointing towards her heart… and the man holding it. Robin looked around himself, taking full measure of her plan. 

“Locksley, I swear if you don’t get your hands off of me, I will…” 

She interrupted herself as she understood the intrinsic entanglements of her plan. If she went through with this… It meant… _Robin_ …

“Regina, look at me,” he pleaded. 

“No. I won’t. Drop this heart, thief. I need to destroy it. I _need_ to. And _I will_ tear it up, make no mistake. Even if… Even if this means… that I have to kill you in the process,” she said in one breath, her voice breaking. 

She intended to mean every word but she could not bring herself to accept the eventuality of his death. She was still looking away, refusing to exchange a glare with him. Robin was talking, trying to reason her but his words were falling flat as she was concentrating her hardest to ignore him. A sensation from deep within herself somehow caught her attention. A feeling of… warmth. Yes, that was it. Warmth. In her chest. Exactly in the spot usually occupied by her heart. It was as if the emptiness she felt since she came back to the Enchanted Forest was now filled. As if the hole in her core was now replenished by… No. No, it couldn’t be. That feeling had never been anything but a cruel joke in her life. It wasn’t about to change.

“Regina,” he called. 

She shook her head and tried to chase away this inner feeling from her mind, but it wouldn’t go away. 

“Regina,” he repeated with his meek voice. “Look at me.” 

And so she did. What she saw in his gaze took her breath away. _He cared for her_. He truly did care for her. She saw how pained he was by her sorrow and by her attempt at taking her own life. She felt his desire to soothe her, to comfort her, to bring her solace… She felt loved. She felt a sincere and loving concern transcending his look. And then, she gave up. Or actually, she gave in. Into him. 

Regina took a deep breath, closing her eyes as the glass fragments were now turning to dust. She felt herself falling forward, but before she could hit the ground, he caught her. He redressed them up, and, as weird as it seems, even if he held onto her, she could still feel herself falling. And she was. She was falling into his gravity; she was falling, deeper and deeper… 

He was pressing soft and tender pecks on her temple, while holding her body and her heart. She had stopped pushing him away and welcomed his embrace. She couldn’t pretend anymore. Her walls were down. Wrecked, for the better. She accepted his help, at last. 

“I’m with you, Regina,” he started. “And I will be, for as long as you will accept me and let me in. I’m with you, milady. And I am so sorry for your loss, and I understand, well… I imagine how hard this might be for you right now, but there is no good reason you should be facing this alone. I will be with you. Every step of the way.” 

She distanced her head from his shoulder, where it was resting, just to look into his eyes. She didn’t say anything, she just looked. She was hoping he could see in her eyes what she wasn’t able to express with words right now. Gratitude. And affection. But mostly, deep, deep, gratitude. 

He held her with one arm around her waist, walking her towards her bed. 

“Now, milady, would you please put this back where it belongs,” he requested, displaying her heart. 

She showed a little bit of disappointment and apprehension to this idea. 

“Do I have to? It feels so much better without this heavy rock of a heart pounding in my chest…” 

“It will heal, Regina. I will make sure it does,” he promised. 

She hoisted a sad expression, defeated, and looked away, once more. 

“Hey,” he called and he put his fingers on her chin, gently forcing her to face him. “I mean it. I will make sure your heart is well taken care of, Regina.” 

And then she nodded, agreeing to his request and curling her lips in a half-smile. Robin brought his left hand, the one with the heart, in the space between their bodies. He looked at it for a moment, as did Regina. Before letting go of it, he brought the vital organ to his lips and kissed it. It was a short kiss, but Regina felt its amplitude in her whole body. She inhaled profoundly as she felt a wave of love hitting her. Then, Robin put his left hand above her sternum, at the level of her breasts. A second later, after she had recovered of her feelings, Regina placed her hand above Robin’s and above her heart. She magically pushed her heart inside her, leaving Robin’s hand to touch nothing but the skin of her chest through the soft satin of her nightgown. They stood still for a moment, drinking each other in. Regina kept the thief’s hand where it was, not wanting to break the warm and smooth contact it offered. Robin was the one to talk first. 

“I will stand by you, Regina,” he pledged. “When the pain cuts you deep and the night keeps you from sleeping, just look and you’ll see. I’ll be your remedy. I will be there for you. Always.” 

And then, he hugged her. He put an end to the embrace, guessing it would be time for her to go to sleep, but she added one last request. 

“Robin?” 

He turned, smiling at her, his dimples showing under his beard. 

“Yes, milady?” 

“Would you stay… Would you stay with me tonight?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it for chapter 2! Again, thank you to those of you leaving kudos and/or comments: it makes my day, truly! And, once more, I want to apologize for my lack of English vocabulary. I wish it were richer, but this is the best I can do. And I can't bring myself to write this fic in French (my first language), since the characters' voices are HIDEOUS in French and it would be too weird to write dialogues. So that's pretty much it. I'll try to update as soon as possible. It will most like be before January 7th. Thank you guys, you're awesome xxxx


	3. Love will come through

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Here's the third chapter. I hope you'll like it. Again, I do not own anything.

Regina woke up after a restful night – something she hadn’t had the luxury of in a very long time. She did not know whether to blame it on the oppressive tiredness which she had accumulated or on the peace Robin’s arms brought her. Or, actually, she couldn’t bring herself to blame it only on that second factor. Her head was resting on his chest, her cheek flat on the light cotton of his nightshirt. His left arm was enveloping her, bringing her closer to him, as his left hand rested on her hip. She couldn’t remember if they fell asleep in that position or if they moved during the night. One thing was for sure: she was in no hurry to wake him. She lifted her chin just a little, in order to get a better view of his face. 

His features were peaceful, even softer than usual. She was thankful to have this moment alone to really look at him without behind surprised by the main interested. His beard told her he probably didn’t shave for a few days. She had never really liked it, but on him… _The scruff simply suits him_ , she thought. His dimples weren’t showing since his muscles were relaxed, but she could guess where they were approximately. He had some wrinkles here and there. Oh, he wasn’t old but he was a very expressive man and his face told his story. After focussing for a while, Regina even discovered small scars she had never even remarked before. Her eyes landed on his lips. Oh how she wish she could just trace them right now, but she knew if she did that he would most likely wake up, and she wasn’t done stalking him. She loved his smile. It was true, sincere, it lightened her. She even appreciated his smirk, even though she would never admit that out loud. Yes, it was sometimes infuriating her, but she liked it despite that fact. Hell, maybe she even liked it _because_ of it. But her absolute favorite part of his face was his eyes. His ocean blue eyes, mirrors of his kind soul, she wished nothing more than to dive and drown into. 

Robin growled a little and slightly moved, bringing Regina closer to him in the process. With the tip of her left fingers, she started to trace the line of his bicep through his shirt, all the way down from his shoulder to his wrist. He was very muscular and she couldn’t deny her appreciation of it. She felt safe in his strong embrace. As her fingers reached his right wrist, she noticed what looked like a tattoo exceeding his shirt. How come didn’t she notice it sooner? She was just about to take up his sleeve in order to expose his wrist when he stirred, waking up. 

“Good morning,” he told her, yawning. 

“Good morning,” she greeted back, retiring herself a few inches back on her right side. 

“How did you sleep?” he wondered, obviously still a little concern about her state. 

“This was the best sleep I’ve had in days,” she responded, honest. 

“Well, maybe you’ll have to consider the idea of me being your extra pillow for the nights to come,” he said, half-joking. He immediately regretted his remark, afraid it was too soon to address her this way. After all, he always thought the irritation and exhaustion she used to show towards him covered affection, but he knew she wasn’t sharing this thought before, and he wasn’t sure now was the right time to tease her in that way. 

“Maybe I will,” she answered, a light smile on her lips. 

Robin looked surprised to her response, clearly not expecting it. He didn’t know if he should be alarmed… Maybe she was so pained, she couldn’t even find the strength in her to snub him like she usually did. Or was she sincere? 

“I’m tired of arguing with you,” she declared, as if she read his thoughts. “I’m exhausted. With Henry gone, and my sister, and with, well… everything that’s happened in my life since… _forever_ , I am exhausted,” she pursued, affliction and pain colouring her eyes as she looked away. “And fighting with you is the most exhausting of all. So I want it to stop. I need it to stop.” 

She silenced herself, bringing her eyes back at his as she breathed in the extent of her words. Through her whole speech, he kept looking at her eyes, his head slightly tilted towards hers. These big eyes, which told so many stories and hid so many secrets he wanted to discover, these irises of a rich brown that reminded him of his precious forest, these brown orbs evoking a so fertile soil of promises to him, these eyes in which he wanted to take root into, these eyes he could recognise amongst thousands… 

He felt relieved that his words didn’t stir her anger, but at the same time, he was sad to realise her desperation. He put his hand on hers, which were pressed against the sheets, and offered her a genuine and comforting smile. She pressed her lips together and stretched them in a semblance of smile. 

Slowly, she pulled away from his hands and got out of bed, walking towards her balcony. Robin’s eyes never left her body, wrapped in nothing but her nightgown. As she approached the balcony, the sunlight embraced her body, letting very little to the imagination considering the delicate satin it was made of. When she disappeared of his sight, he gave her a few minutes to herself, before following her. Her arms were no longer holding her chest and abdomen like the night before, both of her hands were on her hips as she contemplated the land she reigned upon. 

Robin came to find her, standing behind her. He put his arms in both holes created by her bent arms on either of her sides and hugged her waist, his head resting on her left shoulder. 

“I’m so glad you’re still here, Regina,” he said, grateful, as he kissed her above her clavicle. “Last night, I was so afraid I’d… I’m glad you’re alive.” 

“I’m right here,” she said to appease him, as she pressed her back on his chest and laid her head back on his right pectoral, making him feel her presence. She brought her left hand to his cheek and caressed it as she closed her eyes. 

She knew all too well the feeling that was starting – or actually that had started long ago – to build up in her belly. Sure, decades had passed since the last time she had loved, but she remembered it very clearly. She couldn’t help it but struggle with these butterflies. _What about Daniel?_ She felt as if she was betraying him, betraying his memory. Of course, she had been with many other men since his death, but she had never _loved_ anyone but him so far, never even thought she ever would. She wondered if the thief felt the same. She knew he had lost his wife, Roland’s mother, he told her himself when they were in the tunnels, in a mission to put the Witch’s shield down. Maybe someday she would dare ask him. Robin pulled her out of her thoughts as he spoke.

“Regina…” he started, without even knowing how his sentence would end up. “You’re… beautiful.” 

“Shhh,” she stopped him. “Don’t say that.” 

She didn’t seem mad. Her tone was very calm and slow, but Robin didn’t quite understand her despise to his compliment. She turned around, her chest now pressed against his, and her arms around his neck. 

“Not now. It’s too soon. I’m not ready for this. But,” she said quickly, seeing he was about to add something, “I want to be. I’m not ready for this, _for you_ , now. But I want to be. Just be patient.” 

“I understand, and I agree,” he nodded. “But it is true. You are beautiful. And me saying this does not engage you in any way, Regina. It is just the truth. And you have to see it. Just like you have to see the good in you. I told you I’d be there for you, I promised you I will help you heal. And I will. Just let me. I swear I will be patient and I will never force anything on you, but you have to stop underestimating yourself and stop taking the part of pessimism and self-loathing. I won’t let you. But you’ve got to let me help you. Is this alright with you?” 

Her only answer was to hug him in a tight embrace. She was barefoot and had to step on her toes to reach his height, but she did. He was steadying her, holding her waist with one head, her head with the other. He inhaled deeply the perfume of her hair, it was sweet and flowery and feminine and soothing. 

“Thank you, Robin. Thank you so much.” 

“You are very welcome, Milady. Now, would you care to join me for breakfast?”

“I would,” she answered playfully. 

The Queen put on a different outfit, leather pants and a dazzling red jeweled and laced gown, and arranged her hair in a half up-do that allowed some of her curls to come down on her back. Her makeup was a tad lighter than usual and her hair weren’t in a coiffure as complex as they used to, but it didn’t make her any less regal. Robin came to meet her after he changed himself in his room. When he opened the door, he smiled at this vision and couldn’t help himself but to repeat his previous compliment. 

“Beautiful,” he said, echoing his own words. 

“Thanks. But don’t push it, Robin,” she answered, giving him a small condemnatory stare under her lashes. He chuckled. “Just to be clear,” she pursued, “I am not ready for gossips…” 

“Of course,” he reassured her, “I had no intention of making you uncomfortable in front of the others. Don’t worry, dear.” 

She smiled, happy to see they were on the same line. They didn’t even make it to the stairs when David reached them, out of breath. 

“Regina!” 

“Charming! What is it?” she wondered, knowing his haste probably wasn’t unfounded. 

“Your sister, she’s sent others of her flying beasts! They’re in the yard!” 

 

That was all it took for Regina to poof the three of them in the yard. They appeared near Snow and Granny, who was very much occupied trying to shoot the beasts with her crossbow. 

“Regina!” Snow exclaimed, “Thank God, you’re here!” 

“What is all that for?! Why did Greenie send these, she already has my blood and has no more need of it since she’s confirmed we’re sisters?” the Queen asked.

“Actually we could get rid of these monkeys now and talk later, what do you say?” Charming proposed. 

“Agreed,” Regina nodded in a sharp tone, rolling her eyes at Charming's annoying but right insight. 

She stepped in front of the hedge behind which the others were hiding and created a giant fireball, throwing it to three of the monkeys. She succeeded in annihilating the three of them but realised there were at least ten more. Snow gave Robin her bow and arrows and she opted for a sword, fighting side to side with her husband. The flying monkeys were bursting out of every corner, each more aggressive than the other. Charming and Snow were fighting together, slaying beast after beast. Granny was also a very helpful ally, her keen senses allowing her to use her crossbow efficiently. Robin was quick and never missed his target. He was always on the lookout, one eye on the flying monkeys, the other on the beautiful but fragile woman fighting by his side. 

“Regina, they’re coming after you,” Robin noticed and acknowledged her, shouting. 

The Queen looked around herself and she had to admit he was right. Even though the monsters got killed before they reached her body, she couldn’t deny the evidence: she was the Witch’s target. Again. Robin covered her at the best of his skills, drawing an arrow into every flying monkey who dared approach Regina. 

“Enough of this,” Regina said, impatient. 

She closed her eyes and lifted her arms in slow motion, using all of her energy to conjure a soaring red blast to emanate from her whole body. It grew bigger and bigger, and suddenly, she let go of her hold and the magic blast incinerated every remaining flying monkey in the yard. Her shoulders fell, losing their tonus and she breathed out, clearly weakened by her effort. Snow, Charming, Granny and Robin gathered around her to make sure she was alright. 

“Couldn’t you have led by that and spare us the unnecessary fight, huh?” Granny reproached, getting herself a mean look from the Queen. 

“You know, if you can no longer keep the pace, maybe you should consider sticking to the kitchen next time, lady,” Regina retorted at the old woman. 

“Why were these monsters after you, Regina?” Snow said, redirecting the discussion and rephrasing her stepmother’s earlier concern. 

“I don’t know. I don’t have all the answers. What could she possibly want to take from me, we share the same blood? Unless this was a diversion?” Regina suggested, a bit worried. 

Everyone was bringing up ideas as to why would the Wicked Witch orchestrate such an attack. A noise caught Robin’s attention, and he turned his head, immediately seeing another flying monkey coming, its claws set for Regina. 

“REGINA!” he screamed, getting everyone’s attention. 

He reached to get an arrow to shoot but he had no more. Considering the urgency of the situation, he had no choice. He threw himself between the Queen and the beast. No one had time to react in time to prevent Robin’s chest from being lacerated by the monster. As fast as he could, Charming severed the head of the creature. 

“Robin!” Regina gasped, holding his body in her arms. 

“Regina, heal him!” Snow urged. 

The Queen was so caught off guard it wasn’t even her first reaction. Robin’s eyes were closed and blood was flowing out of his wounds. Regina put her hands above the thief’s chest and when the warming light of her magic reached Robin’s torso, it was like it short-circuited. Regina removed her hands and held one in another, surprised by this reaction. She tried once again, and the same phenomenon reoccurred. Her palms were aching, burning.

“Why can’t I…” she traced off, desperate. 

She circled one hand quickly over his cuts and took a good look at both the wounds and the monster's claws. 

“It… it is poisonous. This… it was meant to weaken me. It was meant for me, my magic can’t heal him.” 

Fear grew in her eyes as she realized how powerless she was. Everyone else was looking at her, waiting for her to come up with a plan but her head was empty. Besides the fear of losing Robin, the only emotion she could feel filling her was anger. In her head, she was cursing at her horrible sister. She chased this hatred away for now, in order to concentrate her energies on Robin. 

“Get Friar Tuck to my room,” she ordered before poofing herself and Robin in her chambers. 

 

When she reappeared, Robin was laying on her bed and she was simply petrified. Her hands covered her mouth and tears were threatening to roll down. 

“No, no, no, no… This can’t be happening,” she whispered. 

She caressed his cheek before tearing his shirt apart, revealing his bare chest. There were three long cuts, all the way down from his left clavicle to the middle of his right flank, and they were deep. She couldn’t let him die. She had to do something. But what? 

“You called me, Your Majesty?” said Friar Tuck’s voice. 

“Help him, please. Do you have any kind of treatment, at least to stop the bleeding and to prevent the infection from spreading? Please, you have got to tell me that you do,” she implored. 

The old man came closer to take a better look. 

“I might have something to help him but I fear it won’t be enough to save his life…” 

“Just do what’s necessary to keep him alive until the poison wears off. Once there’s no more trace of the poison in his blood, my magic will work on him.” 

“Alright. I’ll go make the infusion and I will be right back,” Tuck promised. 

Regina tried to clean the wound as best as she could, considering the blood coming from it, and she managed to make temporary bandages until the old healer would come back with his infusion. When he did, Regina removed the dressing she had put on and noticed with relief that the hemorrhage had greatly reduced. She poured a little bit of the liquid on Robin’s wounds and his body tensed at the contact. He was still unconscious but he was growling. Clearly this was hurting him. 

“Shhh, shhh, I’m sorry,” she told him. 

She promised Tuck she would take care of him as he informed her that the poison was aggressive but it would probably drain itself quickly with this antidote. In about four of five days, he thought she could attempt to heal him once more. 

Friar Tuck left the room, leaving Regina alone with the man who sacrificed himself for her. She let her hand wander in his sandy hair and on his cheek in a tender gesture. “You can’t leave me,” she whispered, “You promised me you would not.” She left his side for a second to get a sponge and a bucket of water. When she came back to his side, she removed the remaining tatters of his shirt in order to clean him. She was moving ever so gently, afraid she’d hurt him, afraid he’d disappear… 

“You better hold on, thief. You must hold on to life. You cannot leave me here, alone. And like I said, you promised me. _You promised me_ ,” as her words left her lips, she took his right hand in hers and kissed his fingers. She closed her eyes and tears streamed down her face. How did she get here, weeping over this robber’s body? 

She took the sponge and squeezed it, the water running on the skin of his arm’s muscles. It followed the same path that she traced with her fingers a few hours ago, before all of this happened. She remembered the ink on his right wrist and turned it so she could finally see it. The vision took her breath away. _The lion tattoo_. The one Tinkerbell had told her about and which belonged to her soulmate according to the fairy. Could it be, after all these years? Deep down, she knew, it was it and she wasn’t hallucinating. This image had haunted her too many nights in her dreams; she knew she wasn’t mistaking it. It was _her_ lion tattoo. 

Her index was following the contours of the tattoo, while her mind was trying to process this discovery. “ _Ain’t fate a bitch…_ ” she thought. She ran away from him when Tinkerbell first led her to him, at the tavern. And now, she was discovering his identity, half a lifetime later. She had met him and developed feelings for him without even knowing who he was, and before she got the chance to tell him, she was about to lose him. She could not believe it. Her face was twisted by astonishment, her eyes desperately clinging to the inked lion impregnated in his flesh. She didn’t move for few minutes, gathering her thoughts. 

It was in an awfully heavy silence that she finished washing his body. She never left Robin’s sides for the rest of the day and wasn’t disturbed other than by some Merry Men and Roland looking for news and by Snow bringing her something to eat. When the night came, she crawled into her bed, next to him. She took his right wrist in her hand and contemplated it, once more. She laughed a little. It was a soft laugh, mixed with pain and fear, but still a happy one. 

“I can’t believe fate brought you back to me after I turned my back at it all these years ago… But now that we are here, reunited, I will make sure to never let you go,” she told him. “I don’t know whether you can hear me or not… But you have to fight, Robin. You have to. Just a few more days, until I can heal you. And then… Then we can be together. You said you wouldn’t give up on me. And now I won’t give up on you. I lost love before, and I won’t again.” 

She kissed the lion tattoo and held close to it upon her heart. She turned on her left side, to face him. 

“Goodnight, Robin,” she said, kissing his cheek. 

She curled against his body, being careful not to touch his bandages, and rested her cheek on his shoulder, still gently holding his right hand in hers. Within an instant, the ocean eyes of Robin opened and fell on the beautiful woman by his side, who was about to be embraced by Morpheus. Seeing this, Robin sketched a smile. He tried to move, but was too weak to even lift a finger. He attempted to speak, but before he could utter a word, sleep claimed him as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you thought about this third chapter! I am sorry to say that I do not know when I will be able to publish chapter 4, since school is on again... I know what I want to make it about, though ;) So stay tuned! It may take a while, or even a long while, but it will come.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is it for the first chapter! I'll try to update within a week, maybe less. Maybe. Until then, let me know what you think.


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